"To sleep is to dream..."
...and to dream is to have nightmares.
Sometimes I wonder if I have some sort of major psychological defect that prevents me from dreaming anything pleasant.
I'm tired but I know as soon as I go to sleep the nightmares will hound me and tear at me until I force myself awake.
And as the dreams increase in intensity I know there is something wrong. Most likely something I can't (or don't wish to) fix.
I don't want to dream anymore. Not of things that torture me nor of things that scare me.
I'll deal with it alone as I always do. As it should be.
And now for an unassociated contemplation on myself:
For one who accounts the majority of his suffering to lonliness, I'm very quick to shun people and distance myself.
1 comment:
I wish I could help you chase away your nightmares, or at least you could find someone who could wash em away from you.
just an FYI Sometims even sweet dreams can feel like nightmares, some times the sweeter they are the worse they make you feel.
As for you saying your quick to shun and push people away.. I know what that is like. The fear of getting attached can sometimes overwhelm the fear of being alone.....
~hugs~ I hope you find something or someone that can help with the nightmares. And im sorry I still do not believe your ment to be alone.
You Sir, deserve to find happiness and comfort in the company/arms of someone who cares for you as you do them. For you are a good person and deserve much more then what youve been given. Thats my opion.
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